R  A  L  P H
 The Review of Arts, Literature, Philosophy and the Humanities 

Volume XX, Number 1 --- Early Summer, 2000


NEW LISTINGS
Flyboy Action Figure Comes with Gasmask,
Serving Up A Woman's Arm for Lunch, and
Paul Krassner on a Slow Bicycle


REVIEWS
A Frozen Hell
"The Finnish army may have been motley,
but they were perfectly suited for the landscape ---
many were farmers from the region,
and they fought a guerrilla war not unlike
that of Indochina 25 years later."


Florence Nightingale
Avenging Angel

"It was hardest, we suspect, to survive her inclusion
in the children's hero stories category. That designation
arouses doubt in even the dullest child ---
George Washington with his hatchet,
Betsy Ross with her flag,
Florence with her lamp."


Nagarjunas' "Seventy Stanzas"
A Buddhist Psychology of Emptiness

"Nagarjuna gave lectures to a large audience of seekers.
Two of his students always smelled of sandalwood, and,
it turned out, were not only sweet-smelling,
but were water serpents. Only in Tibet."


BRIEF REVIEWS
A Boy with Loaded Gun,
Peeling Your Love Like an Onion,
and a Daffy Old Woman Named Glorie.


ARTICLES
A Geezer in Paradise
I: Bob Marley and the 3AM Blues
"I open the door to look out at the world
before I say adieu. It's dark, very dark.
They've turned off the moon. Most of the stars
are fading fast. There is a bird nearby, in the arroyo,
singing, "It's real, it's real, it's real." Funny, I never heard that one before."

II: Death in the Mountains
"Pedro Sanchez died yesterday.
No big deal. Except to his family ---
wife Sarah, and the three kids: Emiliano aged 8, Juana, 4-1/2,
and the esquincle, the one they called Junior ---
barely six months old."


READINGS
Garcia-Lorca's Afro
"He had a great big afro. That's where he kept his money.
He just picked it out of his hair." "That's where he kept his dog leash," someone added.
"When he wanted to walk his dog,
he just reached into his afro." "That's where he kept his chicken!
When he was hungry he reached into his afro!"


POETRY
Three from Teachers & Writers
"The sun as a light bulb, the stars as
fireflies, and the sky as blueberry juice
Does it exist at all?"


LETTERS
"Why don't you put new reviews and articles
in your ratty little magazine? I get tired of looking
and finding only the same articles week after week.
Salon changes its articles.
Back when A. W. Allworthy was running things,
things were better."


THE OFFICIAL RALPH
Paradox-of-the-Month


HELP
Perpetuate honest, noisy, pesky book reviews.
Subscribe, and get a free copy of one of the newest titles from
Mho & Mho Works
along with a print-out of some of our most pithy reviews, in
The Folio


THE PREVIOUS ISSUE OF RALPH
This will lead you back to the last RALPH, and,
if you persist, all the way back, through forty issues
to the very first one, out of the dark and wet
Winter of our Conception, 1994 - 1995.


TABLE OF CONTENTS
Titles, authors, and publishers
of all books reviewed in RALPH ---
arranged chronologically.


T H E  F A C T S
Submitting Books

The best way to get books to RALPH for review.
Submitting Reviews

Suggestions for would-be reviewers --- and payment schedule.
History

RALPH didn't spring full-blown from the brows of the gods:
     We've been around (in different guises) for over twenty-five years.     
The Fessenden Fund

Other activities of RALPH's godparents, including
Mho & Mho Works


Lolita Lark, Editor-In-Chief
Post Office Box 16719
San Diego CA 92176

poo@cts.com


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